Buttfucked in Bangkok and Operation Bass Rescue

Holy fuck! How long has it been? 2 weeks? Well even after everything settled there's still this slight disappointed feel I'm goin through at the moment. Anyway, fuck it.

Well Bangkok....what can I say? Beautiful place, for sure. Apart from the language barrier, it's just a cool place to spend a vacation. In fact I'm so in love with the place I'm saving up more cash to make another trip, hopefully end of this year, just in time for Thailand's biggest open air metal festival, the Demonic Festival.

Ok, let's start on a rundown of what happened.

We left on a Friday, arrived on a Friday bla bla bla, met the organiser (Annie, very nice girl with 28 tatts on her body), had dinner with her, Migo and me drank our livers off. Bedtime.

The next day, we went to Chatucak, a place where you can get clothes for dirt cheap. Really cheap. I finally managed to get the army pants I've been looking for, only RM 30! But then there were a few people (lets call them A and B) who took hours trying out shoes! At one store! What the hell? i could see Along getting bored and tired while Ajax was pretty restless as well. I tried hard not to reveal my frustration and I could see Migo just accompanying A and B for fucks sake. He was dead bored as well. I mean, we have a rehearsal session at one of the studios after this and we were already flat out! It took them hours more to go "oooh and aah" over pairs of shoes and they finally bought what they liked.

So later that evening, our organiser took us to this jam studio which we were really amazed of. It's pretty secluded, as in it sits behind some squatter looking houses and you need to tread through this creepy pathway to the studio. It's obviously a house converted into a studio with 3 studios if I'm not mistaken. We managed to book the best studio, and highlight the word BEST. Jesus christ, the amount of gear in that studio is probably equal to Maiden's recording session gear. Messaboogie STACK amps, Peavey amps, Leney bass amps and a lot more. The bass amp is as big as the amp in Bentley (Bkt Bintang) where you use to try out your basses. And there were so many guitar pedals! None of our studios here provide any! So we took 2 hours to fine tune our setlist and once that was over, the bill came. 360 baht! That's like RM 36 for 2hours, and guess what? That is THE most expensive in Bangkok! Holy shit! With that many gears and quality, it's still cheaper than any of our pariah studios over here. So after that we headed out to Immortal Bar to have a drink and meet the great Fa.

At the Immortal Bar, we were treated like VIPs thanks to the organisers. Fa met us upstairs and the first thing he asked us is "Do you guys drink whiskey?". He need not ask actually. So 1 bucket of whiskey arrived, and boy it was good. We had a long chat with Fa and he was asking about our scene and stuff. Great guy. Guess what? He gave us a 2nd bucket and Migo and I were happier than pigs in shit. Then A and B, who were obviously left out, told that they wanted to leave, and they didn't mind us staying back. Sensing the restlessness in them we decided to call it a day as well. But we felt that it would be odd just leaving after having free drinks. So we went to the counter where this nice sweet lady was (later we found out she's actually Fa's pregnant wife) and asked for a 3rd round. So, we finally saw how it was made. A few shots (more like half a bottle) of Whiskey Thai, a bottle of Red Bull and lime, and of course ice cubes. Then we took the bucket and forced Fa to share it with us. He was sharing with us the previous 2 buckets but called for a time out. Somehow we managed to force the godfather of Thai metal, and of course he's a nice guy and gave in.

Then came the third day, GIG DAY! We left pretty early and reached the venue at 11 for soundcheck. There was another band who was sound checkin and the drummer scared the shit out of us. His kicks and strokes were hard enough to shrink your balls and twist them. He was in fact the drummer of Breathless, Thailand's very own Agathodaimon. Corpse paint and leather, you name it.

I'm really not in a mood to write everything so I'll just cut it short. Throughout the gig Migo and me drank bottles after bottles of beer which were given to us courtesy of the organisers (this was a reason for the friction after this but I'm too lazy to mention it). We shared our beers with everyone we met, literally everyone. Migo and I were already flying sky high when our turn came. But nevertheless, we put up a good show. The videos proved it despite A and B claiming the opposite. The crowd loved us and sang along to our songs. I was totally out of my mind, jumping here and there, doing Abbath squats and even jumping into the crowd with my bass. After our set, jesus, I was hugged by people I've never met in my life!

Later we spent the night watching the other bands play, drinking more beer and some whiskey. Then came the time to bid our farewells and pack up. I was packing up with B and somehow she said something really vulgar which I never liked. But being the nice rational guy I am, I chose to ignore it.

Bla bla bla, bla bla bla, we arrived at our guest house in a taxi and as soon as I got out of mine, I saw a white elephant screaming and rolling on the ground while the black one was trying to defend her from any possible threat. We were the threat and the oversized elephants were...ermm you know...

I pulled Ajax back and while they continue to swear at us, and trust me, the words were not really nice. We kept quiet like civilesed men when the elephants ran amok. Next thing we knew, we saw them walking out of our guest house with their luggage. The four of us were really blur about what just happened and just sat down, watching them walk away. For some reason, i told the rest to stay while I run after them. So then I found them sitting down in front of the 7 Eleven, eating some bread and crying. A screamed at me and told me to fuck off but why should I? You're leaving us without giving any reason and you expect us to just sit and ponder about it? I told them I deserved an explanation and so that was what I got. These are the few things they said which pissed them off:

-we were pissed drunk and totally unprofessional on stage
-we were wild uncivilised men on stage
-we DEMANDED for beer during the gig
-we humiliated ourselves with our drunk performance
-ajax was rude
-Migo wasn't a professional band leader
-we only sold 3 CDs out of 10
-we were sucking up too much to Fa
-who the hell is Fa? He's no one in the scene
-we bored Fa and overstayed our visit, we should have left after the 1st bucket

So those were the reasons they gave. 90% of them were and still are childish. I still can't accept any of them as a reason to dump us behind without any money. But thank God, I had extra cash with me which was later spent to cover all of our asses.

So now back at the guest house, I told the boys what they told me, and we potted all our money. Ok, we do have enough to pull through for the next 3 days. But nevertheless, we lived like beggars. We spent the next few days eating cheap cup noodles and drinking tap water. 3 of the 4 of us smoke and we told ourselves that has to stop. The next day, barely 12 hours since our last stick, we knew we couldn't go on like this. So I walked to the 7 Eleven and asked the cashier for the cheapest cigarettes they have. An unknown brand for 380 baht. Ok that's cheap. Took the pack back and we all agreed that when want to smoke, we'll all share a stick. And true enough cheap cigarettes are really bad. All of us could only bear three puffs the most. So sharing was a good idea after all. And coming to Bangkok wanting to try all their good food, I knew that was just a dream. We didn't have any money to afford rice and I abstained from pork because of the cigarette sharing. Wasn't really a big problem.

So that evening, our 4th day in Bangkok, Annie came by and said she wanted to take us out to show us around. Now, no one told her bout what happened, and when she asked we just said A and B had an emergency and had to rush back. But she sensed something amiss and we were forced to spill the beans. Shocked she was, and she said a little sightseeing would do good. Well since I wanted to get some souvenirs I thought lets just finish off all the hunt today so we can spend the next 2 days staying in our room, to cut costs. She took us the Chaophraya river, and to some nice temples around there, where I got my pendant of Buddha. Then we went to some cultural center where finally, I got something for my house which would be proof that I have been to Bangkok. Then when we were about to laeve, Annie said she wants to take us to Y2J tattoo parlour in Silom Patpong. Reluctantly, we agreed.

At Y2J, we met the guys who run the place, who happen to be the guys from Breathless. Thon, the bassist, and one of Thailand's top tatt artist showed me all his vinyl collection. From Emperor to Burzum, he's the biggest black metal fan I've met! I also learned that he had traveled to France, Sweden and Norway to learn the art of tattoos. And while he was in Norway, he paid Varg Vikernes a visit in prison! Holy shit! Couple of hours later Annie called the organisers in along with the Breathless guys and told us to tell our story to them. So, another replay and all of them had their eyes bulging. Obviously they were annoyed at how our 'managers' acted and even offered to take us around Bangkok the next few days. We were really grateful but politely declined. Before we left, I was telling the boys, with the little money we have, let's pay Fa a visit at Immortal. I didn't want him to regard us as cheapskates , seeing him only to promote our band while drinking free whiskey. All of us agree unanimously and so we were at Kaosan Rd minutes later. We spent some hours talking to him and also to Bad from Zany Zone and ESP. Apparently Bad is a Hindu and ESP is his pagan Hindu Black Metal band. A very interesting guy. Religious as well. He's got so many religious pendants on his necklace and one of them is a wood carving of Buddha that is 400 years old. By the way, he's a composer with the Thai cultural exhibition, where he composes folk songs from Thailand's 4 different regions. And he's a big fan of Paganini. That's totally metal!

Then Migo dropped a bomb on my head. Fa had been impressed by how we played through word from some of his friends (he has spies, I say!) and offered us a slot the next day, at a freaking 1 am! At Immortal Bar?! Holy shit...the Mecca of South East Asian Metal!

We agreed to the offer but we knew we will be in some trouble. At Nakhon we played 6 songs where the first two were played on A's Dime Slime with a standard E tuning. The other 4 were played on Migo's which was dropped D.

The next day when we arrived at Immortal, I was embarrassingly shocked! I though Fa just invited us to play for fucks but that guy is a maniac! He printed out fliers that read "IMMORTAL BAR PRESENTS BANNBODO: Thrash Metal from Malaysia, Tonight 1 am". And the fliers were pasted on the walls and spread througout Kaosan Rd. I immediately pulled Migo aside and told him that playing 4 songs wouldn't be a good idea. And true enough, Fa approached Migo later and asked Migo if we were able to play 6 songs instead of 4. I was already in a bad mood thanks to the bass which was fucked up and to add to my frustration, the last 50 ringgit I had couldn't be exhanged into Baht because the banks only accepted RM 50 notes, minimum. I had my 50 in tens. Fortunately a currency exchanger at the ground floor was able to change my tens. Oh and no, money changers in Bangkok are NOT mamaks. They were Thai.

So we decided to play 2 songs twice, to make up the number 6. While waiting for our set, we watched the in house band play. Really kick ass! They could really cover RHCP note for note, from the bass to the vocals. And Fa featured for them for Enter Sandman. He's a really good vocalist. While watching the band play, we had side entertainment as well. 2 white chics were making out throughout the set and boy, they were really steamy. On the bar table, against the wall...crap, Along's eyes were glued! Then of course came the oral and everyone had their eyes on the girls instead of the band.

Then came our turn. I wasn't actually satisfied with how I fared, considering the condition of the guitar itself. It was never in tune despite how many times you tune it. And to top it all, it was louder than Migo's guitar's! So it was a bass and drum attack! Hahaa! The crowd, made up of all white people, really had a good time. Everyone knew the covers we played and sang along to it. After our set, we were treated by Fa to a bucket of whiskey, each!! I had a good time apart from the bass fuck up.

The next day, which was our last day was a day we've been looking forward to. With our cash drying up, we were grateful we survived this far. Annie came along with Te and Tic and an orgy of photoshoots to place. Annie, always in her cheery mood kept picking on Along since day 1, made it worst this time. Talk about seeing a guy blush! Lol!

We took the cab to Suvarnhabhumi Airport and we were glad the little money we had was enough to pay up the cab. We checked in and then we knew, we were safe. We met those two soon after that but didn't bother in striking a conversation right until we reached LLCT. At LCCT B called me up and told that we have to pay up the full amount of the expenditures that they had incurred throughout our journey. Originally I was only supposed to pay half of the ticket price, which would have amounted to some 250 something riggit. Now they said that I have to pay the full amount and also other expenses. I saw the amount and nearly had a heart attack. RM 918 and a few cents! I was like "WHAT THE FUCK?!" and asked why am I being charged this much. They said it was the overall expenses etc and the rest would be charged the same.

I was quite annoyed at this. As it is, my bass is stuck in their studio and now I have to get her back AND pay nearly a thousand bucks! This is all too silly.

And to top the icing on a very bad cake, I was broke. I went to Bangkok with over 800 bucks and only came back with 21. I needed help. And my folks shouldn't know about this.

So I contacted Dave and explained to him everything. Thank God he's nice enough to loan me some cash to pay those idiots. They mentioned that I can pay in installments (which I could pay up without the extra help) but after all that has happened, I told myself it's best this is done with ASAP. Then I got in touch with my partners in crime on stage and in the pubs, we were set for OPERATION BASS RESCUE.

After 1 and a half weeks since we were back, OBR took place. We had Jai, Shan, Wan and myself. All of them have heard my side of the story and also badly salted ones from others. So, word has spread. And it wasn't me cos only 4 people besides the band know what happened, Dave, Jai, Shan and my brother Hari. And all the other versions point the rifles at us, the band, so I reckon A and B had gone on some promotional stint after our return.

We met them at their studio, and boy, they seemed happy to see us. We talked about stuff not related to the Bangkok Buttfuck but when I saw we were just wasting time and asked about my share of payments, they moods turned 180 degrees. Then Shan asked the smartest question any circus bear had asked in the history of circus freakshows. "What actually happened?" So they spilled everything out. Their version was very accurate, but I realised they overacted on certain parts and of course, they covered up their mistakes. I was quiet all the while cos it was pointless arguing back. I just wanted to end this. Then the bill came. But before they mentioned the figure, I told them I wanted a clear statement of all the expenses. I wanted to know why I'm charged ridiculously. As usual, they repeated everything and then I butted them and by saying that all the expenses in Bangkok, I paid for it whenever it concerned me. The taxis I rode in, Migo and I chipped in. You should have seen the looks on their faces. But they were nice enough to agree with me and also cut the ticket price by half, as per the agreement with Migo. And after all the money paid, and receipt collected (which I insisted on during the short meet at LCCT). And it was time to leave, and finally with my baby, my bass. AT LAST!

From there, we drove to the studio and we jammed for 2 hours. Damn, I haven't played my bass in over a month and I missed her so much. The bass I had in Bangkok was just something I couldn't grasp, and it is the main reason why I didn't play well at Immortal. But now finally, thanks to Dave, Jai, Shan and Wan, she's back!! One of the happiest days of my life, for sure!

But thinking back on what happened, I personally feel it was all too silly. If they were mad at us, they could have talked to us, like adults. Instead, they put up a Discovery Channel reenactment on the streets of Bangkok with every passer by staring at us. But whatever that is done, is done. History. I'm just happy I'm off their books and I hope the rest of BannBodo are too, as soon as possible. What happened in Bangkok was a true display of unprofessional business ethics and immaturity.

Before we left their studio, we exchanged apologies, but I seriously considered mine was totally unnecessary. But like we've heard for so many ages, it's easy to forgive, bot not to forget. It's something I'll remember for a very long time. I'll just consider it a lesson I've learned in life.

Operation Bass Rescue

You know, I just came back from Bangkok like a week ago, to say I had a good time, I really did, and to say if I had a bad time...hell I did.

GOOD TIMES
Arriving in Bangkok, shopping at Chatuchak where I finally got my army pants I've been searching high and low over here, hanging out with Fa and the boys at Immortal Bar and of cos, bussines...playing at Nakhon and Immortal.

BAD TIMES
Getting dumped by our manager for no apparent reason, without any money to survive with, eating cup noodles, drinking tap water, and later being demanded to pay up the management company for all they've spent on us. Oh, and what I'm really sad about, my bass is still stuck with the manager.

Damn, can't think right at the moment. So many things running through my mind, so many questions I want to ask. But it all boils down to this Saturday, Operation Bass Rescue.

I know you guys want a full frontal on what happened in Bangkok, both the good and bad times. Let Operation Bass Rescue (OBR) take place first, and then I'll have a relaxed mind to tell you guys. A relaxed mind? Hopefully.

Great Idiots

The Master


The Apprentice

If you wanted to lose, you could have at least done it like a real man. Go down fighting.

Liverpool displayed a performance so cantankerous no fan could fathom. A Champions League semi-final always produced exciting games, regardless who's playing. But this wasn't the case for last night's match between Chelsea and Liverpool.

The game started off really boring, with Chelsea having the upper hand in ball possession and build-up play. Liverpool on the other hand were constantly kept at bay despite possessing one of Europe's top marksman.

An underfed striker, a dysfunctional midfield and a battered defence provided an impotent lineup which their goalkeeper fell victim to on three occasions.

Even before the match when the lineup was announced I knew it was going to be a waste of time watching the match. You're trailing by half a goal from the previous leg and you still insist on fronting the attack with only one striker. Crouch who displayed beautiful football (for an Englishman) in his previous match was left to warm the bench.

Yes, at first I wanted to blame the pitch, but it would be silly. It's a fact that Chelsea despite being one of the richest clubs are cheap in maintaining their pitch. The rain just worsened things. But then please tell me how could Chelsea still put a good show despite all of this shortcomings? Home support? They're well adapted to their field even how crappy it is? Maybe. But still, Liverpool aren't a Derby County to have minor glitches hampering their football.

Benitez, for some idiotic reason decided to do a Mourinho by talking crap about Chelsea and their players. Well he was forced to eat his own words when the player he criticized opened the scoring. Didier Drogba. Drogba has proven himself worthy countless times by scoring amazing goals for Chelsea for the past few seasons. How could anyone be so absurd by saying he (Drogba) is just mediocre? You yourself possess top strikers who can't properly finish a simple ball and you dare say such things. I know about the mind games gaffers play to have an edge over the other team, but for God's sake! This is Chelsea, at a Champions League SEMIFINAL!!! Your criticism is motivation to the counterpart. Deco, Messi and Ronanldinho made fools of themselves by giving a press statement that they're gonna tear United apart. Not even close. It should have been a lesson for Benitez to shut his mouth from the start.

Of the many Liverpudlians who have done so well this whole season, a number of them were awfully disappointing last night. Alonso was useless throughout the game and Lucas would have been a great replacement. Mascherano has been quiet since he talked his way to a red card against United in the league and Gerrard, it's time you gave up the skippers arm band, till you prove yourself worthy of even wearing one. You dishonoured captaincy by keeping quiet against Masherano's sending off (against United) and you just gave the game away last night. Where was the ever so robust Gerrard? Where were the tackles we all loved to see? Where was the fighting spirit that made your name? Having a yellow card from the first leg doesn't entitle you to be an asshole by playing safe in the second. A leader should go all out even if it means he's not able to carry the flag in the next battle. He should be willing enough to take a shot for his team to come out tops. In the 1999 semifinal against Juventus, Roy Keane was already on a yellow card from the first leg. But he battled out to hold his team together, earning him a yellow card in the process. That yellow card barred him from playing in the final if United were to win the bout. He never bothered playing safe just so that he could take part in the final. He, like many great leaders, wasn't selfish. Gerrard on the other hand, showed every reason why he should be stripped off the skipper's post. He was selfish. Go all out, get banned, but rejoice in the fact that you sacrificed yourself for your mates to pull through. Till today, I'm not really bothered about who scored against Munich, bringing the title back to Manchester after 31 years, but my respect is (and forever will be) for the man who got them to the finals.

Liverpool were lucky to draw the game level with Torres's goal. But they shouldn't have stopped there. Instead they decreased their determination to stretch the match to extra time. How smart. Saw what happened? I don't blame Hyypia for the penalty, never will. He's been one of my favourite players and skipper Liverpool has had for the past 10 years. It was an unintentional foul. Ballack had already dribbled past him and had two options, pass the ball out of the D box, or cut to his right where only Reina is at his mercy. And like any great defender (Moore, Adams, Lee), a pre-emptive strike always helps. But unfortunately Hyypia was plain unlucky.

With just one goal down, Liverpool were still in the game if they had at least tried to push on. But NOOOOOOOOO, they decided to spread wide like a whore selling herself. 3-1. What surprised me after that is the substitution of Torres for Babbel. WOW!! They only guy who can possibly score against Chelsea and you took him off. WHAT?! For what?! Babbel's inclusion proved fruitful but a little too late. Pennants introduction late in the game would have paid IF only Crouch was there. So many long balls, so many crosses, but who's there to finish it? Or at least try?

I've mentioned this to my friends before, that I'll only don a Liverpool jersey to a match only if they manage to beat one of the big four in a season. But from yesterday's display of tactical stupidity, miscalculation and selfishness, I'm only gonna start wearing my jersey (for a match) when the Reds finally lift the League trophy. It has been nearly 20 years since they last did it and with the mentality they have (who cares about physical ability) at the moment, it's gonna take them another good 20.